


A Day in the Life~ January 2019

by happy29



Series: A Day in the Life [19]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-07
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-23 23:58:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 4,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17693648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happy29/pseuds/happy29
Summary: Follow Steve and Danny through daily text message exchanges concerning work, family and their extended Ohana as they continue to navigate their relationship with one another and their everyday encounters.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cadyblu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cadyblu/gifts), [RanCodiEvan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RanCodiEvan/gifts).



> To everyone- A Huge thank you for following us and continuing to leave us kudos and reviews. We love and appreciate you all. We have now crossed into a new year for the guys and their family. While we continue to follow the show and add our own take on the episodes, we also are glad to follow our hearts and not follow canon, thus keeping Joe alive. Thank you all for the support and we hope that you are still enjoying the series. Thank you for taking the time out of your busy days to join us on this adventure.
> 
> To liz… I love you!


	2. Chapter 2




	3. Chapter 3




	4. Chapter 4




	5. Chapter 5

January 5, 2019

Letting Steve go alone to see Joe was very difficult. I want to be there for him when he needs that shoulder to cry on, so he has someone to help hold him up when he wants to break down. Last night was great though. Good bye sex is always great, although bittersweet at the same time. I'm not sure when he will be back and that is hard to deal with, the unknown. Joe needs time to heal, he needs his spirits lifted by someone other than Sarah who can be a major mother hen. God can she mother hen someone until they go crazy. I didn't think she would ever leave me alone when I was recovering from being shot. It all makes sense though now, she was also in place to keep me safe since we didn't know anything about Ray or if there was going to be another attempt to take me out. She really is a great person and she is so good for Joe despite the major age difference. 

I hear mini-me coming up the stairs... time to start the day.

I miss you already Steve.

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

January 6, 2019

Well that was a phone call I wasn't expecting this morning bright and early. God what the fuck? Catherine showing up at Joe's ranch with the guy that orchestrated the hit on Steve and his team stuffed in the trunk of her car. I really hope I remembered to pack a bag because I have a feeling after I got the kids all squared away without scaring the shit out of any of them that I won't be home for a few days. This has every potential of getting ugly. We have had so many situations turn really bad that I think I have lost count. Leave it to me to love the guy that is a danger magnet. He's so good at what he does, that all the bad guys want him eliminated. Even bad guys from long ago.

I'm worried about what I'm going to be walking into. Steve didn't sound like himself on the phone. He sounded disconnected and distant. I don't think I've ever booked a flight so fast in my entire life. God if he does anything stupid before I get there I will strangle him myself. Losing our heads will get us nowhere.

Fuck... that's all I can think right now. This is going to be bad.

 


	7. Chapter 7




	8. Chapter 8

January 8, 2019

Did another thing today that has me torn. I sent Steve with Catherine, Wade, and Junior and Frank's daughter Lucia to get his guy. And I stayed behind to protect Joe and Sarah. I wanted nothing more than to be at Steve's side, but I also felt that it was more important for me to be here in case something goes down here and Sarah needs help. Steve has a solid team behind him and I trust them all. But I needed to stay behind for our family. And maybe it's two sided as well. If something happens to him... God please no, but if something does go wrong... One of us will still be here for our family.

I'm so tired of making these decisions. I'm tired of being separated by thousands of miles and a million emotions. He won't be himself until this is over and I know that. I need my Steve back.


	9. Chapter 9




	10. Chapter 10




	11. Chapter 11




	12. Chapter 12

January 12, 2019

My world came crashing down this morning at 3:13 am when Rachel showed up at our house and told me Grace never came home from a party. I was a cop and trained to remain calm in situations like this but all that goes out the window when it is your child. I don't recall the drive to the hospital after we came across the accident. Gracie was being loaded up into an ambulance and there was nothing Rachel or I could do to help our baby but sit and wait and pray for a miracle. God I felt so helpless. Steve came as soon as I called him and nothing felt better than to be wrapped in his arms. We still didn't know anything about Grace's condition and Katie was barely hanging on with her own array of injuries. How could this happen to my baby? She was always so careful when she drove. Rolling through a stop sign didn't cause this accident.

Katie's dad was beyond furious, anger and fear all trapped inside and after looking back it seems logical that he would aim that in my direction and at Grace. Everyone assumes that cops always get their kids out of trouble. But I've never had to do that with Grace. She's a good kid. I'm worried about Katie as well. I haven't met her but her name rings a bell. Shattered leg, punctured lung and internal injuries. Those won't be an easy walk in the park to recover from. I see lots of rehab in her future as well as Grace's.

It's been a hell of a long day and I've been everywhere in the emotional department with Rachel. Angry with her for letting Grace go to the party to begin with, but that dissipated into a combined fear for our daughter's recovery. Rachel was just as scared and upset as I was and there was no use bickering with each other. When the doctor had told us there were complications, I felt the world tilt. In that moment, I was Rachel's rock and she was mine. We were both beyond scared. What if Grace didn't bounce back was the only thing running through my head. I couldn't leave that hospital without her. That was not an option. Gracie has been my world for the last 16 years.

Steve and Lou figured out what had happened to cause the accident and I wanted nothing more than to wrap my hands around that kid's neck. To make him feel the pain that I've had to endure for the last day. It would never equal what we as a family have been through. Steve had brought the boys and ma and pop and then taken them all back home. I had asked him to come early the next day and bring coffee and Gracie's blanket but after I sat there for two minutes, I needed him back by my side. I love Rachel because she is the mother of my children, but I needed my spouse by my side tonight. So when I wake up scared, he can wrap his arms around me, when I wake up crying he can be there to calm me down. I need him to hold me, to tell me it's going to be okay when I can't yet let myself believe that Grace will have a full recovery with time.

I've never been so scared in my entire life.


	13. Chapter 13

January 13, 2019

My Gracie is alive. A little broken but alive. God I don't think I slept a wink last night. I just remember sitting in that hard chair with Steve beside me, Rachel on the other side of the bed, just watching Gracie breathe. In and out, slow and steady. I don't know how many prayers I've sent up to God thanking him for sparing her life, for leaving my baby girl here with me. Rachel finally dozed off and Steve sat there so quietly beside me, holding my hand while I held Gracie's with my other. He distracted me with stories of our daughter and his first year of being her dad. I can't believe how much our lives have changed.

Nurse Bob shocked the hell out of me when he showed up with lounge chairs that unfolded into mini beds for us. It was a tight fit in Gracie's room but I was so grateful. I think I even hugged the guy. I had to have fallen asleep at some point because when I woke up, I was covered with a blanket and had lines down the side of my face from the edge of the bed. Rachel laughed and Steve tried to contain his amusement but I didn't care if I had permanent marker streaking my face, my baby was alive. And even she was giggling.

 


	14. Chapter 14




	15. Chapter 15

January 15, 2019

Waiting is not my strong suit by any means and waiting for Gracie to regain her strength so she can go home is giving me so much pent up anxiety that I don't know what to do with myself. I had to get away from Rachel and her bombardment of questions today so I went to the gift shop and got a gift for Katie. Giraffes always make me smile and I'm glad her father accepted it on her behalf. We talked for a few minutes about the girls' prognosis. Neither one is going to have an easy time. The doctor is hoping that maybe by the weekend Grace can come home with us. I've missed Steve here today but I understand that one of us needs to be at work and I'm not about to leave.

It's good to have him back here tonight. I couldn't make it through this without him. He is the level head when I can't be. Reading what I just wrote makes me laugh. I just showed Steve and he kissed me and just smiled and shrugged. He's the best, this husband of mine.


	16. Chapter 16

 

January 16, 2019

My baby boy turns 7 today. He is growing up way too fast. Even with everything that has happened the last few days, I can't believe that I still forgot today was his birthday. Steve will tell me it's okay, but it's not. I can't dwell on it though but it still upsets me.

I don't know how we crammed so many people into Gracie's room and I'm pretty sure the one nurse was about to put her foot down and tell half of us to leave but we quieted down and they let us have an hour to celebrate Charlie's birthday. He sat on Grace's bed with her and asked her to help him unwrap his gifts. I'm thankful Nahele picked up a few small things to say they were from Steve and I. He is a special kid, our oldest. He is turning into a very kind hearted young man. No, he has always been kind hearted. I love him so much. I think he even picked something up for Rachel to give to Charlie. I won't come out and say it to anyone, but I'm pretty sure she forgot as well. She gave Nahele an extra long hug when he handed her a gift wrapped in bright blue gift wrap and a shiny silver bow.

Charlie didn't care that we were celebrating in Grace's hospital room, he didn't care that he didn't have any school friends there with him. All he cared about was sitting on his sister's bed and asking her for help. I don't think he really needed it, but somehow sensed that Grace needed to feel useful in some way, to feel less broken and not the center of attention. I wish I would have taken pictures. I'm sure someone did.

Stan felt a bit out of place amongst my family but Charlie pulled at his arm and tugged him right to Grace's bed and God did that pull at my heart strings. I've struggled with sharing my kids with him and have over the last few months gotten better at letting him have his place in their lives. It never seemed more important than in this moment. He's not an outsider, he's a member of our Ohana. And from the look he gave me from the oversized chair next to Grace's bed, he struggles with still being a member of my kids' family. I take all the blame for that. And I hope with the solid hug that lasted longer than any hug or handshake I've ever given the man, that he knows he will always have a place in their lives. 

The nurses finally kick everyone out and I say my good-byes and I love you's to my family as they head home. Gracie is quiet, almost asleep when she turns her head towards us and smiles. "Thank you, for having Charlie's birthday here."

I kissed her forehead as does Steve and her mom and then she drifts off. Bob is back with our mini-beds and I thank him again for making the small party happen in the first place.

One day closer to taking my baby home.


	17. Chapter 17

January 17, 2019

I can't believe Steve took my journal home with him this morning, the putz. I'm sure he was just in a hurry and grabbed it by mistake. I'm so thankful for the earplugs to drown out Rachel's snoring. God I forgot how bad it can get. Such noise coming from such a small person is incredible. I'm really glad Steve has stayed here with me this entire week. It has helped me to be able to actually get some sleep and bring my anxiety levels down. I love him so much. For all of our bickering and disagreements, I'm glad he chose me.


	18. Chapter 18




	19. Chapter 19

“Rachel,” Danny touched his ex-wife’s elbow softly, hoping not to startle her. She seemed lost in thought as she watched Steve assembling a Lego village with Charlie in the living room. With tiny Lego pieces scattered all around them on the carpet, Charlie giggled with delight as Steve assembled something that roughly resembled the Camaro. “Rach,” Danny called again. This time Rachel acknowledged his presence with a turn of her head and a small smile. “Why don’t you take the pull-out in the apartment. Stay the night so you can be close to her.”

Rachel shook her head. “Danny, no…” she stopped and returned her attention back to Charlie and Steve lost in their own little world. 

“Please,” he insisted. “I know you’re upset she didn’t want to go home with you and you’re reluctant to leave. Please stay.”

Rachel looked torn. “I don’t want to upset her by staying.”

“She won’t be upset. She will be delighted to see you here in the morning for breakfast, trust me.”

Rachel turned to give Danny a hug and he pulled her into a tight embrace. “She’s going to be okay, Rachel. Our Monkey is going to be okay.” Rachel stepped back and Danny wiped away the string of silent tears that began to fall down her cheeks. “Alright?.”

Rachel nodded and forced a smile. This was difficult on all of them. “Thank you,” she whispered as she kissed his cheek.

“You’re welcome.” Danny turned his attention to the duo in the middle of the living room floor, allowing Rachel to regain her composure. “Hey Charlie, what do you say to Mom spending the night in the apartment?”

Steve’s head snapped up and he met Danny’s pleading eyes.

Charlie grinned from his spot on the floor. “Can I spend the night in the apartment too?”

Steve looked from Rachel to Danny and then down to Charlie across from him. “Sure you can. I bet your mom would love that.”

“Of course I would love it,” Rachel said as she stood beside Danny. 

Charlie jumped to his feet, barely able to contain his excitement. “I need to pack!”

“Pack?” Rachel asked confused as Charlie zoomed past her towards his bedroom. “What’s he talking about, Danny?”

Danny chuckled and moved to help Steve clean up the Lego disaster. “He likes to pack his carry-on suitcase when he stays with Nahele.”

“Seriously? But he’s in the same house.”

“Doesn’t matter to him.” Steve worked himself to his knees and groaned when they popped. “Why can’t we ever play with these things at the table?”

Danny laughed and pulled Steve to his feet. “That would take all the fun out of it, Babe.”

“Not for me it wouldn’t,” Steve muttered as his knee popped again. 

“You okay?” Danny asked concerned when Steve rubbed his knee.

“Yeah. I’m good.”

“I’m going to go make sure Charlie packs his toothbrush.” He gave Steve’s hand a gentle squeeze before heading to his son’s room.

“Are you okay with me staying?” Rachel asked carefully. “I don’t want to impose and I certainly wasn’t expecting Danny to put the offer out there.”

The truth was, Steve was reluctant to have Rachel under the same roof as Danny. When Rachel had mentioned first thing in the morning that Danny had said her name in his sleep, Steve didn’t want to be anywhere near her and had quickly left the hospital in search of something he couldn’t explain. He had dodged Danny’s phone calls most of the day and then seemed to be able to evade him when Danny was out in search of him to clear the air.

He didn’t have to look too far inside of himself to realize that he was jealous. It was irrational and he knew it. Danny loved him, but it still bubbled up from within. He didn’t want Danny having any dreams about Rachel, let alone ones that made him call her name out in his sleep. He had heard it too, loud and clear. He loved Danny and knew that Danny loved him. But still… there it was.

But Danny and Rachel, they also have a history that Steve just found really difficult to ignore. Married, divorced, back together again, separated by lies. There was always the fear that Danny would want Rachel back to keep his family together. Again, Steve knew this to be irrational thinking on his part but he couldn’t help it. And here Danny was, offering the pull-out couch to his ex so she could be close to their daughter. It was a hard pill to swallow.

“Can I get you a cup of coffee or tea?” He pushed his own feelings to the side for the sake of what Gracie needed. God knows he was always telling Danny to do the same.

“Tea would be lovely.” Rachel smiled and followed Steve into the kitchen.

Steve filled the tea pot with water and put it on the stove to heat. He pulled out an assortment of teas for Rachel to pick from and wasn’t surprised at all when she picked Danny’s favorite.

“With all that has happened this past week, I haven’t taken the opportunity to thank you for finding out what happened to Grace and Katie.”

“I knew something had to have happened for Grace to have reacted the way she did. She’s a good kid. You and Danny raised a great kid.”

Rachel gave him a warm smile from across the kitchen. “You’re allowed to take a little of that credit as well, you know.”

Steve flinched at the stove. He wasn’t expecting that comment.

“You have been a huge part in Grace’s life since we moved here and I know how much she looks up to you for guidance. As much as I would like to take all the credit for raising her with Danny, you have done a fine job as her father as well.”

“Thank-you, that uh, that means a lot to me. Your kids are my world and I will do everything in my power to protect them.”

“I’m ready.” Charlie declared from the kitchen doorway, his carry-on handle in one hand, his turtle tucked snuggly under his other arm.

“Remember what I told you?” Danny asked as he ruffled Charlie’s blond hair.

“Yes, Danno.” Charlie now seemed defeated. “Don’t keep mommy up all night.”

Steve poured some boiling water into Rachel’s mug and handed it off to her.

“I don’t think you have to worry about that tonight, Danny. I think we are all pretty tired.”

“I’m not tired.” Charlie declared loudly.

Nahele ruffled his hair from behind. “How about I tell you one of my stories then?”

Charlie turned and jumped into Nahele’s outstretched arms. “Yay, I love your stories! Mommy, Nahele tells the best stories. Better than Danno.”

“I wouldn’t go that far, Charlie. Danno tells some pretty good stories when you listen to him. Like that Christmas one last year with all the bad santas and the angels and the Christmas miracle.”

“That was my favorite.”

“Rachel, I’ll tell Charlie a story and then you can have the apartment to yourself. Make yourself at home. Little Charlie knows where everything is.”

“That’s very kind of you, Nahele. Thank you.”

“Bring your tea and I’ll get the pull-out ready for you.” Nahele shifted Charlie to his other hip and kissed his brother’s nose. “What kind of story tonight?”

“Surfing turtles!” Charlie exclaimed and all the adults made confused faces.

“Surfing turtles it is.” He set Charlie down and pointed to his suitcase. “Come on, let’s show your mom our cool crib.”

Rachel smiled warmly at the bond between her son and his adopted brother. She picked up her mug of tea and followed the two boys towards the apartment. “Good night.”

“See you in the morning, Rach,” Danny said.

“Sleep well.” Steve echoed his husband. “Good night, Charlie.”

“Night, Daddy.”

Danny met Steve at the stove and wrapped his arms around his husband. “Thanks,” he whispered into Steve’s neck as he rested his head against his partner’s chest.

Steve wrapped his arms around Danny and pulled him close and felt Danny sigh with content. “Thanks for what?” he asked, playing dumb.

“For not making a big deal out of Rachel staying.”

“I will admit I was a bit shocked when it came out of your mouth.”

Danny stepped back and looked at Steve’s face and could see the hurt.

“I’m sorry. I should have asked you first.” Danny let go of Steve and shoved his hands deep into his pockets.

Steve pushed off the counter. “That would have been nice yes. But I can be civil for Gracie’s sake. I’m going to bed. Don’t forget to set the alarm.”

Danny stood in the middle of the kitchen feeling overwhelmed. Steve was still upset with him and had no qualms about showing it. He dropped his head and let out a frustrated sigh. If Grace had chosen to go home with Rachel, he wouldn’t have been above begging to stay at her house so he could be close to his daughter. That was the only reason he had offered the pull-out bed in Nahele’s apartment, not because he had some secret crush going on with Rachel again. He loved Steve, and Rachel and him were over a long time ago.

He flipped off the kitchen light and went to the door to set the alarm. He deactivated the one to the apartment for the night in case Rachel got up to check on Grace. He didn’t need her setting it off and scaring everyone. That was the last thing he needed.

He went upstairs and passed his bedroom and found himself staring at Gracie as she slept. Battered and bruised, but alive. Quietly, he made his way to her bedside, dipped down and kissed her forehead while she slept soundly. They had come so close to losing her. He retreated to the doorway and fiercely swiped away at the falling tears. He had never been so scared in his entire life. Losing your partner or spouse was horrifying but to lose someone that you helped create and bring into the world, well Danny had no words. He felt like a little piece of him died as he was waiting to hear if she was going to be okay and that little piece had not been revived yet, even with the encouraging prognosis. 

He leaned against the doorway, continuing to wipe away the tears that refused to stop falling as he watched his daughter breathe. Inhale. Exhale. He found himself matching her every breath with one of his one. She would be dead, Katie too, if a passing motorist hadn’t seen her car lights shining up into the black night and called for help.

Danny wasn’t aware how long he had stood watching Grace sleep, but it felt like a lifetime and suddenly, exhaustion won over. His legs buckled and he slid down the door frame, knees bent and hands coming up to cup his face. He felt transported back in time like he was sitting on the floor of the hospital again, away from everyone else, waiting for news. Only that time, Steve had found him, had comforted him. He never felt so alone as he did right now.

He wiped his tears on his shirt and pushed himself up off the floor. The flooring creaked under his feet as he made his way into his bedroom. Steve had the lights off and appeared to be asleep, facing the middle of the bed. Danny stripped down to his boxers, tossing his clothes in the hamper by the closet. He pulled his side of the covers back and crawled into bed. There was this tension between him and Steve since the morning and his heartbeat sped up once again being so close to him. It was rare that they ever went to bed angry with the other. He needed his husband now more than ever.

He pushed his apprehension down and snuggled into Steve’s personal space. He wrapped his free arm around Steve’s waist and pulled himself as close as he could physically get to his husband. Danny pressed his forehead into Steve’s chest and felt everything inside of him let go. In the span of ten minutes he broke down a second time. Exhaustion, relief, endless amounts of fear for Grace’s well being, her recovery, understanding Katie’s Dad’s own anger towards him and Grace, the events of the day with Steve being distant and never telling him outright what was bothering him, dealing with Rachel… everything had finally taken its toll on him. He tried to stifle the sobs that were building but was unsuccessful. A strong arm settled over his waist and held him tight and Danny finally let it all go, not holding the tears or sobs in any longer.

Steve held him tight and whispered “It’s gonna be okay” as he pressed kisses into the top of Danny’s hair. ‘How could I be so stupid?’ Steve thought to himself as Danny shook in his embrace and he held him tighter. “I’m sorry, Danno.” And Steve knows that isn’t enough tonight.

Danny repeats the same expression, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” losing the ability to form any other sentence. He keeps repeating the same words over and over before Steve silences him with a soft kiss to the lips.

“It’s gonna be okay,” Steve repeats and Danny nods as if he finally believes him. They kiss again, the tears and sobs finally subsiding and neither one let’s go of the other. Steve loses track of time but knows that it’s gotten very late. Danny had finally succumbed to much needed sleep. He mumbles Grace’s name several times in his sleep and Steve continues to hold his husband. He smiles fondly at his husband and kisses the top of his head repeatedly when he hears Danny mutter Flippa’s name along with several incoherent words that Steve couldn’t make out even if they were written down. Danny is a sleep talker, especially when he is  beyond the point of exhaustion and Steve acknowledges to himself he really was jealous earlier in the day for no good reason. 

Danny loved him. He kissed his sleeping husband once more. “I’m so sorry, Danny. I love you.”

And leave it to Danny to hear him in his sleep. “Love you too.”


	20. Chapter 20

January 20, 2019

What an exhausting day. 20 of Charlie's classmates over for an impromptu party thrown by my mother. Our house will never be the same. Kids are loud and ask a million questions. They still believe Nahele is the Aquaman character. I think even some of the parents were in awe, like we hired the actor for the party. Our life is certainly full of crazy moments. I'm glad that we were able to have his party at home with Grace here with us. I'm thankful she is out of the hospital and on the road to recovery. I don't think I've ever had a more stressful week. Well that's not entirely true, Steve has given me a few good scares and Charlie's initial bone marrow transplant had me beyond worried. But I'm not going there. Everyone is fine... 


	21. Chapter 21




	22. Chapter 22




	23. Chapter 23




	24. Chapter 24




	25. Chapter 25

 

January 25, 2019

If this husband of mine doesn't stop doing stupid things at work, I may have to force him to retire because my anxiety levels and my blood pressure can't handle too many more episodes like today. Granted, he did what he had to do in order to save our team so I can't be too terribly upset but I can still be mad at him for scaring the shit out of me for way too long while I was waiting for him to resurface while I was on that boat. God... he's killing me. I think he specializes in giving me a coronary. I don't know how much more of this job I can take.


	26. Chapter 26




	27. Chapter 27




	28. Chapter 28




	29. Chapter 29

 


	30. Chapter 30




	31. Chapter 31

 

**Author's Note:**

> We do not own Hawaii 5-0 or its characters and no money is being made from this adventure of ours.


End file.
